running with emotions..

That's more deadly than running with scissors any day. Man, why do I keep running down this hall with all these doors and I keep picking the same freaking door. The paint changes, different door.. But the same disappoinments, people I can't reley on and I just don't know what to do. My emotions are running wild and its making me sick. Why does it seem that I just want to be loved by just one but I refuse to let the one who wants to do it. I choose to push away those who seem to have my best intrest and understand that I need the strongest foundation I can get for those who only want me there for their best intrest. Im tired of hurting at the expense of others glory. I need to find an umbrella to stand under... can anyone spare some room?